Venting

I need to vent....people are so stupid when it comes to "love" (myself included). I used to think that everyone should be monogamous. Love your man treat him right and he will love you back, life will be good we will all live happily ever after......bullshit! Men cheat...women cheat..it doesn't matter how good you are to them, it doesn't matter how faithful you are to them....Men don't really want that..they say they want a good girl, a wholesome woman but really...they treat them like shit then leave for chicks who have slept with the world. Can you tell that I got burned? I have. I do not take anything that anyone says at face value. I am always looking for the ulterior motive always looking for the game that people try to run on you. I have become a cynical, uncaring little bitch..there I have said it for the world to hear. I really don't care about much anymore...in no way shape or form do I have high expectations of anyone...if you aim low you really can't be surprised or hurt by stupidity. I just read my words and I am like damn...I used to be good..I really did. I was quiet and I cared what everyone thought and tried to make everyone happy. People just take advantage soo much, it's hard to keep being that way.

Anyway, that is not what I want to vent about. I cheated (I have been promoted from burnee to burner, but really is it cheating if you don't want to be with the person that you're with?) with a guy that has a girlfriend, and two kids (I'm horrible get over it). Even though I am bitter and uncaring I would normally not engage in this type of affair but he was giving me the right attention (at the right time) , saying all the right things and he was persistent. We met up a couple times it was cool... The company was good..the sex was good (he introduced me to some new things), but he was stupid.
His phone got disconnected twice for going over the minutes...because we would talk on the phone for hours everyday while we were both at work. When the phone got disconnected the second time I realized that he was calling me from the phone that he shared with his girlfriend. How much more stupid can you be....of course she would find out. Okay so she found out and she made a big stink of the whole thing. She would leave me messages like "Can you please send xxx home? I have to go to work and I need him to watch the kids. I can't afford to miss another day of work because I am not loaded like you." When the hell did I become loaded? Someone must be spending out all my money because I don't see any of it. When I finally decided to give her the time of day she cried to me about her family and at that point I started to feel a little bad for her, so I agreed not pick up the phone if he called me and not to call him. That lasted about 2 hours....I was all ready to keep up my end of the bargain until I heard that she told all kinds of people (that I know) all kinds of things that were not true, one of them being that I paid the guy to sex with me. At that point all bets were off. I stopped calling him but everytime he called me I picked up the phone and he sure did call...everyday..even at times that I did not particularly feel like talking to him (spiteful for no reason...I'm awful I know).

So recently (not sure exactly when) the girl found out that we were still talking. On Saturday she called me (from an anonymous number...I hate when people do that) and was like what is wrong with you, why are you picking up the phone everytime my man calls you. WTF!!??? Are you serious?? Are you paying my phone bill? No. So I hung the phone up on her. I came to an agreement with her and she tried to play me. Sorry talking privileges are revoked. She called me like 6 times in a row, I ignored the calls...and didn't check any of the voicemails. So last night I check my voicemail and she is cursing and carrying on. She's like I don't know what you looking for but you are going to get it...Ummm I never pursued your man...he actively pursued me and if I wanted him I would be with him and you wouldn't. She's like don't make me blow this out of proportion....Ummm go ahead. She's like don't break up my family...Umm how exactly am I breaking up your family? Your man is trying to get me to leave my man so he can be my man and I am breaking up your family. Seriously...get a life.

And get this...her man is screwing someone else....not me but someone else. I broke off what we had a little while back, but we still talk and he was telling me that he is just not happy with her...he was like she is not like you she has no ambition, she just wants to sit around and wait for me to do everything for her, la la la la...I can totally understand what he is saying because I am kind of in the same situation. It's hard to be with someone that adds no value to your life, especially when you are not "in love" with them. Anyway, I am straying from the subject....he went to this party with his cousin and his cousin hooked him up with this girl. They danced or whatever and she gave him her number. Next morning he calls me and we were talking about the whole thing and he was like should I call her. Being the cold hearted person I am I was like you are never going to be with me and you are not happy with her so try to find someone that will make you happy and have a good time....so they did! -- But yet it's me that this chick wants to curse out.....curse your man out damn it!! Leave me alone....If you want your family to work out so bad then try talking to him and finding out what the hell is wrong with your relationship....Don't call me and say some dumb shit like Oh, when my man cheats I curse/beat the girl then I go home and make love to my man....who does that??.....that is the most stupid thing I have ever heard in my life.